Sunday, August 13, 2006
  It's a Test! PGR is up.

So, I decided to take the test over at Unintelligent Design.

1. Which of the following is a new indication for breastfeeding?

A. Breasts can’t be confiscated by airport security.

2. You arrive to work at a Level 3 neonatal intensive care unit(NICU) to find that you will be caring for a set of three day old triplets. The mother of the infants wishes to discuss kangaroo care for her children. Which of the following is the most appropriate way of handling this situation?

A. I'm sorry but there are no animals allowed in the NICU.

3. When can dietary improvements have the most impact on our risk of coronary artery disease?

D. Hmmmmmm jelly donuts. Purple is a fruit right?

4. Which of the following potential long term benefits of breastfeeding has recently been studied?

A. Xray vision.

Really. It helps if the mom already has X-ray vision. I think it is so like, the babies can just look at mom and see how much milk is in.

5. Which illness can result in exercise intolerance and periodic bouts of coughing in children and adults?

C. Hand, Foot in Mouth Disease

I had my foot in my mouth once during yoga. It was really gross, so I started coughing a lot.

6. What has recent study shown to be a potential link to increased sexual activity in teens?

D. Music with degrading lyrics.

7. Other than family, who should be involved in making decisions about the medical care of a child?

D. Brittney Spears

Dr. Bartram has clued us in to how very, very smart she is.

8. What statement does 43% of the American public agree with?

A. There's always room for Jello.

Purple Jello, of course.

9. What has led to the dramatic decrease in pediatric Hemophilus influenza type B (HiB) infections over the past decade?

There wasn't a right answer listed for this one, because it is obvious that the energy vibration of the earth's atmosphere is not harmonious with HiB, or I guess I should say that HiB has evolved into disharmony with that vibration and so is no longer flourishing.

10. What should be taken into account when deciding to resuscitate a premature infant?

A. The gestational age.
B. Parental wishes.
C. Medical condition.
D. All of the above.

11. Which child focused strip mall establishments do the American Institute of Ultrasound Medicine think you should avoid?

A. Timmy Tobacco's Wacky Shack
B. Chucky Cheese After Dark
C. Lead Based Pottery By You
D. Prenatal Portraits with 4D ultrasound.

All of these are bad institutions to be sure, but Clark forgot to mention the worst of them all: Sanrio (The Hello Kitty store).

12. What popular strategies were not supported as effective means of reducing the incidence of allergic disease and asthma in a recent study?

A. House dust mite avoidance.
B. Stress Management
C. Increased dietary Omega-3 intake.
D. Both A and C.

See, now I was stumped on this, until I came across Clark's use of the plural, because I'm a word geek. That's what I am. And my geekiness revealed to me that if he used strategies in plural, there must be more than one strategy, and there was only one answer that involved more than one strategy: D.

Hmph... I only got 8 wrong. Smarter than I thought. I guess I should go read the posts, and so should you if you want the real answers.
 
Comments:
Thanks for the link. I'm sure you will ace the test after reading the posts. I've actually been to Kentwood, Louisiana, the home of Brittney Spears. I have to be honest and say that her dumbitude is not entirely her fault. That place just ain't right.
 
I forgot to mention that I was there on a pilgrimage to worship at the sight of her birth: the vacant lot behind the Dairy Queen.
 
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A Mormon housewife who loves truth, science, rational thought, and reasonable action.

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Granola is a mix of things: grains, nuts, bits of dried fruit, maybe some coconut. There's some fat in it, and it's a good source of fiber to keep those arteries and colons clean.

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